The NEXT contest...

[SgtM]

I have one.. Although I'm not entering, I thought I would share. I just can't beat any of these.

On Monday, I started a new job in a call center. I'm going to be a "billing specialist". (it's a BS job until a better one comes along) Anyway, they have an online knowledgebase, and wanted us to log in so they could show us around. Well, we got a login screen, but after that 500 errors popped up across the board.

Trainer - Everyone log out. Now, see the little button with the green light on the computer, press that and hold it until the computer shuts off.

Me - NO!!! That's a BADDDDD idea.

Trainer - We do it all the time.

(meanwhile I hear computers turning off all around me)

Me - It's a bad practice, and will mess up the windows image, and possibly some hardware. We could have just elected to restart the machine, which I have already done, and will not fix the problem anyway. You need to call IT and submit a trouble ticket. It's a problem with the user ID we are using, and multiple logins.

Trainer - And you're so sure of this? What makes you think you know, you've only been here 2 days.

Me - (pulls out MCP card) I'm Microsoft certified. I build and mod computers because it's fun. I'm capable of maintaining the server room.

Trainer - </pics up the phone and calls IT>

Today will be my 3rd day of work there. I swear I'm losing IQ points each second I spend in the building.

[Airbozo]

That is funny sgtm! Hey at least they were using the power button.
I had a customer that swore he was shutting his computer down properly. "I hit the button, wait a few seconds and pull the power cord". Me: So long as you don't mind paying my fees to fix your computer every 3 months you are using the correct procedure...

[TheGreatSatan]

I build and mod computers because it's fun. I'm capable of maintaining the server room.

Trainer - </pics up the phone and calls IT>

He probably had no clue what you meant by Mod..

[DaveW]

Wouldn't it be good to have a 'STFU' card? It could be like the Phsycic paper from Dr Who, except more insulting.

-Dave

[Airbozo]

Wouldn't it be good to have a 'STFU' card? It could be like the Phsycic paper from Dr Who, except more insulting.

-Dave

My favorite is RTFM! People are always asking me stupid questions and I always ask if they have bothered to read the manual. The only vanity plate I have ever wanted was RTFM, and I see the guy that has that plate at least half a dozen times a month on my commute.

At the hockey games, they have a STFD card. (Sit The Frick Down) Both in yellow and red. The yellow one is an informational warning, the red one is a "do it again and your gone".

BTW Dave, you never responded to the SEP comment...

[Luke122]

On the topic of fun acronyms, I've always been a fan of "DILLIGAF".

"does it look like I give a f...?"

[armadilloben]

I have one.. Although I'm not entering, I thought I would share. I just can't beat any of these.

On Monday, I started a new job in a call center. I'm going to be a "billing specialist". (it's a BS job until a better one comes along) Anyway, they have an online knowledgebase, and wanted us to log in so they could show us around. Well, we got a login screen, but after that 500 errors popped up across the board.

Trainer - Everyone log out. Now, see the little button with the green light on the computer, press that and hold it until the computer shuts off.

Me - NO!!! That's a BADDDDD idea.

Trainer - We do it all the time.

(meanwhile I hear computers turning off all around me)

Me - It's a bad practice, and will mess up the windows image, and possibly some hardware. We could have just elected to restart the machine, which I have already done, and will not fix the problem anyway. You need to call IT and submit a trouble ticket. It's a problem with the user ID we are using, and multiple logins.

Trainer - And you're so sure of this? What makes you think you know, you've only been here 2 days.

Me - (pulls out MCP card) I'm Microsoft certified. I build and mod computers because it's fun. I'm capable of maintaining the server room.

Trainer - </pics up the phone and calls IT>

Today will be my 3rd day of work there. I swear I'm losing IQ points each second I spend in the building.

I PITY, I PITY THE SGTM! some of these people i mean holy **** i remeber my 6th grade pc teacher (i class i easily got a+ duh lol) in that class she basicy thought we coudlnt use word meanwhile i was using proxys to get into albino blacksheep bc i had already finished typing a sentance in word and i had topped all of the 8th graders cuz i was coding in dreamweaver when they were bragging how they made a movie with a moving car... man that class bored the **** out of me i mean she made us close every single program down b4 opening another up! like she had no ****ing clue were the minimize button was! and i could understand doing that if u had a pc with minimal rescources but i mean we were running 2gb of rambus and 3.8 p4's

[xmastree]

i had already finished typing a sentance in word

Heh, did you spellcheck it?

[DaveW]

BTW Dave, you never responded to the SEP comment...

??? I think i missed something.

-Dave

[TheGreatSatan]

*************Ends on the 16th; you have 5 days remaining********************